Friday, July 12, 2013

Plans...

Just over 5 weeks ago we talked about you meeting my friends for the first time... it meant a lot to me that you were going to make the effort, take that step.

That meeting would have been this weekend... I am now glad that I hadn't planned that trip and booked flights and accommodation... it would had been an un-necessary expense.

Instead I have a weekend at home...
A weekend where I'm turning on the light and trying to see the trees in the forest... I'm not ready for following any paths but looking around me, the light is still dim.

I'm trying to move on... it is hard, I think of you often, I think of where you are and what you are doing. In the end you told me one of the problems was I knew what you were doing, where you were and what you planned... you are right I did but be aware that you created that.

This weekend I meeting new people... a photo get together with fellow 365ers, a Christmas in July party with new friends.  I'm trying to move on... I'm not ready for a new relationship, I need time to recover, I need time to let go... I need time to learn to trust again

That will be the hard thing... I let you in, I trusted you and you abused that, not just by ending our relationship but by somethings you said so I need time to learn to trust again

Just over 5 weeks ago we were planning ahead...
Just under 4 weeks ago you were ending our relationship...

No wonder I was blindsided..,


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